Letting Go: Rest from Perfectionism and Control

Finding Peace in Faith, Fitness, and the Power of Surrender

“Do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.” — Matthew 6:34

We live in a culture that praises hustle, glorifies busyness, and silently equates worth with productivity. Even within our faith journeys and fitness routines, there can be this subtle pressure to get it all right—to do more, be more, look the part, perform the part, and somehow find peace at the finish line.

But what if the peace we’re chasing never lived in the outcome?
What if it’s found in surrender?

In this blog, we’ll take a deep breath together and look at the often-hidden weight of perfectionism in our physical and spiritual lives. Through scripture, stories from saints, insights from Catholic philosophy, and practical encouragement, we’ll explore how letting go of control actually opens the door to grace—and true transformation.

The Illusion of Control: When “Doing More” Doesn’t Bring Peace

Perfectionism doesn’t usually come on loud. It whispers.
It says things like:

• “If I just pray harder, I’ll be more holy.”

• “If I never miss a workout, I’ll finally love my body.”

• “If I get it together, God will bless me more.”

What starts as a desire for growth can morph into an exhausting need to perform—to earn worth through spiritual success or visible results.

I’ve seen this in my own life and in the lives of countless clients. The physical and emotional symptoms of perfectionism are often hidden under dedication and discipline. But the fruit? Anxiety. Burnout. Shame when we fall short.

The danger is that we begin to believe a lie: “I have to be perfect to be loved.”

A Saint’s Story: The “Little Way” of St. Thérèse of Lisieux

St. Thérèse of Lisieux is one of the Church’s most beloved saints—not because she was outwardly impressive, but because she was radically honest about her weakness.

At one point in her spiritual journey, she realized she wasn’t capable of climbing the steep stairs of perfection. Instead of giving up, she offered God her “little way”—a path of complete trust and surrender.

She wrote:

“I will try to find a little elevator to lift me up to Jesus, for I am too small to climb the steep stairway of perfection.”

Her elevator? The arms of Christ.
Her method? Trust.
Her focus? Love over performance.

St. Thérèse’s story reminds us that holiness isn’t about striving harder. It’s about resting in the arms of the One who carries us.

When Perfectionism Shows Up in Fitness

Now let’s talk about how this plays out in the gym, in our nutrition habits, and in how we see our bodies.

Fitness perfectionism often sounds like:

• “If I miss a workout, I’ve failed.”

• “If I don’t look a certain way, I’m not trying hard enough.”

• “Once I hit my goal weight, I’ll finally be happy.”

But the body is not a machine. It’s a temple. And temples are tended with care, not punishment.

Perfectionism in fitness creates a cycle of self-rejection. We view rest as weakness, hunger as failure, and our reflection as a report card. And yet, God invites us to treat our bodies with dignity, not domination.

You don’t have to control every variable to be healthy.
You don’t have to fix your body to honor it.
You can nourish, move, and strengthen your body from a place of peace—not punishment.

The Wisdom of Josef Pieper: Your Worth is Not in Your Output

German Catholic philosopher Josef Pieper saw this struggle coming long before social media amplified it. In his book Leisure: The Basis of Culture, Pieper warns against defining ourselves by productivity. He writes:

“The precondition of leisure is that we do not define ourselves by work.”

In a society obsessed with doing, Pieper argued for the importance of being—of resting, reflecting, and receiving.

When we tie our identity to our output, we forget we are human beings, not human doings.

This mindset shift is radical:
What if we don’t have to earn our rest?
What if rest is holy?
What if grace is received, not achieved?

Trusting the Process: Spiritually and Physically

Healing—whether it’s spiritual or physical—is not linear.
It comes in waves, in seasons, in quiet shifts that sometimes take months or years to see.

Trusting the process means showing up when progress is slow.
It means choosing consistency over intensity.
It means believing God is working in the hidden, even when we don’t feel it.

In fitness, that looks like respecting your rest days. Eating enough to fuel your body. Listening when your body needs gentleness instead of grit.

In faith, that looks like praying even when it feels dry. Choosing hope even when answers don’t come. Letting God do the heavy lifting of your soul.

One of my clients once said, “I finally stopped trying to fix myself, and that’s when I started healing.”
That’s the power of surrender.

Your Body is Not a Project—It’s a Place of Encounter

This truth is central to Rebuild the Body: Your body is not a problem to solve. It’s a sacred space to encounter God.

When we let go of perfectionism, we make room for presence.
When we release control, we make space for communion.
When we stop treating our workouts or prayers as performance, we begin to find peace.

God does not love a future, more disciplined version of you.
He loves you, right now, even in your mess, even in your weakness.

A Gentle Challenge: One Step of Surrender

If you’re reading this and you feel the tug—if you recognize perfectionism’s voice in your head or the tight grip of control in your heart—take this challenge:

Write down one thing you need to let go of.
It could be:

• A fear you’ve been hiding

• An unrealistic fitness goal

• A spiritual pressure you’ve put on yourself

• A personal struggle you’re tired of carrying alone

Then surrender it to God.

You can pray something simple like:

“Jesus, I give this to You. I don’t want to carry it anymore. Help me to trust You with it.”

Let it be a small, sacred moment of release.
You don’t need to have the perfect words. Just the willing heart.

Final Thoughts: You Were Never Meant to Carry It All

Perfectionism promises peace but delivers pressure.
Control promises safety but delivers anxiety.

But surrender—real, holy, trust-filled surrender—brings you back to grace.

You were never meant to carry it all.
You were meant to walk with the One who already has.

So breathe. Rest. Take a step back.
Not because you’ve earned it, but because you are already enough.

You don’t need to prove yourself—just return to the One who made you.

If this reflection spoke to you, share it with someone who might need to hear these words. And if you’re ready to rebuild your body—and your faith—brick by brick, with grace and patience, you’re not alone. Let’s keep going together.

Rebuild the Body: A Lenten Guide to Resting Well” is a Catholic Lenten devotional designed to help you embrace faith-filled rest while strengthening your body and soul. 

In a world that glorifies constant activity, this guide teaches the spiritual and physical benefits of rest, drawing from Scripture, Catholic teachings, and fitness principles to help you balance movement and stillness, surrender and strength.

Inside, you’ll find daily reflections, scripture-based mindset shifts, and simple breath prayers & restorative workouts to help you renew your strength this Lent. 

Whether you’re and athlete, a busy Catholic professional, or someone seeking spiritual renewal, this devotional will.

Download your copy today and discover how true renewal happens when we trust God’s timing.

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